epic-humor: mama-bird: coffeeandklonopin: coffeeandklonopin: carpe diem - seize the day carpe noctem - seize the night carpe natem - seize the ass Seriously, if you guys don’t stop reblogging this I am going to carpe someone’s neck and break it. carpe collum - seize the neck X
Police: where do you live?
Me: with my parents
Police: where do your parents live?
Me: with me
Police: where do you all live?
Police: where is your house?
Me: next to my neighbors house
Police: where do your neighbors live?
Me: if i tell you, you wont believe me
Police: tell me
Me: next to my house